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    Toxic Positivity Is Out: Why Women Are Finally Feeling It All

    Toxic Positivity Is Out: Why Women Are Finally Feeling It All

    For years, we’ve been told to “just think positive” and “look on the bright side”—but what if forcing a smile isn’t actually helping? Enter the backlash against toxic positivity. Women are finally rejecting the pressure to be relentlessly upbeat and instead embracing the full spectrum of human emotions. From sadness to anger to sheer frustration, feeling it all is the new self-care. Here’s why sitting with your emotions, rather than suppressing them, might just be the most radical act of wellness yet.

    By Dandy / Mar 04 2025

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    Let’s talk about something that's been making our emotional lives a little… shall we say, unrealistic? The rise of toxic positivity. It's been shoved in our faces on Instagram memes, wellness blogs, and (ugh) well-meaning conversations. You know the ones: “Good vibes only!” “Just think positive!” “You got this!” While the intentions behind these phrases might be pure, the impact can be anything but.

     

    But here’s the thing: Women are finally starting to say, enough is enough. We’re embracing the full spectrum of emotions—and honestly? It feels so much better. Here’s why toxic positivity is on the outs, and the messy, wonderful range of human emotions is making a comeback.

    What Exactly Is Toxic Positivity?

    Let’s start with a quick refresher. Toxic positivity is when you feel pressured to only express “positive” emotions—like happiness, gratitude, and optimism—while dismissing or ignoring any other feelings. Basically, it's like pretending everything is sunshine and rainbows, even when you're stuck in a thunderstorm.

     

    It sounds harmless, right? But here’s the catch: when we constantly push aside feelings like sadness, anger, or frustration, we don’t get the chance to process them. Instead of allowing ourselves to feel real, we wear a mask of faux happiness that only builds emotional pressure. Eventually, it all bubbles up in unhealthy ways.

     

    And that’s where women, tired of bottling it all up, are stepping up and saying, “You know what? I’m allowed to be human.”

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    The Power of Feeling It All

    When we talk about embracing the full spectrum of emotions, we’re talking about feeling everything. From the joy of laughing so hard you cry, to the frustration of traffic (oh, the traffic), to the heart-wrenching grief after a loss. Every emotion has a purpose. It’s like they’re all trying to tell us something, and when we ignore them, we’re missing out on learning something valuable.

     

    Take sadness, for example. Society often tells us to “cheer up” or “move on” when we’re feeling down, but here’s the thing: sadness is a normal, important part of life. It gives us the space to heal, reflect, and recharge. When we allow ourselves to sit with sadness (without feeling like we have to “snap out of it”), we get the opportunity to understand ourselves more deeply.

     

    And let’s talk about anger for a sec. As women, we’ve often been told to keep our cool, smile, and “be nice.” But guess what? Anger isn’t the enemy—it’s a signal that something’s wrong. Maybe someone crossed a boundary, or maybe you just need a bit more space for yourself. Anger is an emotion that, when handled healthily, can lead to powerful change. So, instead of bottling it up until it explodes, women are learning to express it in constructive ways.

    The ‘Feel Your Feelings’ Movement

    There’s a whole movement happening right now, where women are choosing to feel instead of fake it. It’s about letting go of the guilt around “negative” emotions and showing up as your most authentic self. Influencers like Chidera Eggerue (The Slumflower) are encouraging followers to embrace solitude and the messy parts of life, while Jameela Jamil uses her platform to call out toxic positivity and show the real, unfiltered side of wellness. Women like Glennon Doyle and Sarah’s Day are boldly sharing their struggles, breaking down the expectations of constant happiness, and showing us that it’s okay to not always be okay.

     

    These voices are leading the charge, showing us that vulnerability is not weakness—it’s where the real connection and healing begin. Whether it’s a social media post, a podcast, or a book, more and more women are embracing the idea that feeling it all is far more empowering than faking a perpetual state of bliss.

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    The Benefits of Embracing All Emotions

    So why is this shift so important? Here’s the thing: when we start embracing all our emotions, we actually feel better in the long run.

     

    Improved mental health: Suppressing emotions is exhausting. It can lead to stress, anxiety, and burnout. But when we let ourselves feel—without judgement—we release that built-up tension.

     

    Better relationships: When we allow ourselves to be real, others feel safe to do the same. That’s how we build authentic connections. Vulnerability leads to deeper, more meaningful relationships with family, friends, and partners.

     

    Increased emotional intelligence: When we stop denying our emotions, we become more aware of how we feel and why. This self-awareness allows us to respond to situations in healthier ways instead of reacting out of fear, frustration, or overwhelm.

     

    More freedom: Letting go of the need to always be “happy” opens up space for true joy. You can enjoy the good moments even more because you’ve allowed yourself to fully feel the harder ones.

     

    Why Women Are Leading the Charge

    Women have long been expected to carry a lot of emotional labour: managing the feelings of others, looking after family, maintaining relationships, and generally being the “glue” that holds everything together. But guess what? We’ve been doing all this while suppressing our own needs and emotions.

     

    Now, women are saying, “Enough of this.” More and more women are rejecting the narrative that we must always be calm, happy, and put-together. We’re embracing our full humanity, and guess what? It’s freeing.

     

    Whether it's sharing a #realmoment on Instagram or having a tough conversation with a friend, women are giving each other permission to feel. And that's powerful.

    So, What’s Next?

    As we embrace our emotions in all their messy glory, the world around us is starting to catch on. Wellness spaces, brands, and influencers are taking the hint and moving away from that good vibes only mentality. Instead, they’re encouraging self-compassion, honesty, and emotional expression.

     

    The goal isn’t to wallow in negativity, but to acknowledge it, process it, and move forward in a healthier, more balanced way. It’s about becoming a whole person—not just a smiling face on a meme.

     

    So, next time someone tells you to “just think positive,” you can smile (or scowl) and say, “Thanks, but I’m good with feeling my feelings today.” Because the truth is, we’re all allowed to feel it all—and that’s something worth celebrating.

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    Disclaimer: The content on this site is for informational purposes only and should not be considered professional advice. Always consult with a qualified healthcare provider before making any decisions regarding your health or wellbeing.

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