Raising Feminist Kids: Everyday Ways to Teach Inclusivity

Raising the next generation of feminists isn’t about big speeches—it’s about the everyday moments. At Dandy, we believe inclusivity starts at home, in the books we read, the language we use, and the examples we set. Here’s how to weave feminist values into daily life, without the overwhelm.

By Dandy / Feb 11 2025

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Let’s get one thing straight: raising feminist kids isn’t about handing them a copy of The Feminist Manifesto and calling it a day. It’s about weaving inclusivity, equality, and a general sense of “everyone deserves respect” into your day-to-day. And guess what? You don’t need to make grand speeches or hold a protest in your living room to do it – though, hey, if that’s your vibe, go for it.

So, let’s talk about how to raise little feminists without making it feel like a school lesson. We’ve got simple ways to instill values of equality, respect, and kindness, all while keeping things fun, relatable, and very much not like a boring classroom session. Grab your favorite cup of something; let’s get into it.

1. Equality Is Caught, Not Taught

Kids are like sponges, right? They soak up everything – including all the little things you may not even realize you’re teaching. So, if you want them to believe in equality, it starts with you showing it in your daily actions. You don’t need to shout from the rooftops that equality matters; just model it. Simple stuff like splitting the housework, taking turns with chores, or sharing decision-making goes a long way. If they see everyone pitching in, they’ll understand that no one’s role is defined by their gender.

And, hey, if you’re a parent juggling a million things (who isn’t?), talk about it. "I'm making dinner tonight because Dad's helping with bedtime!" or "I’m working late, so Dad’s picking up your homework." It’s less about saying “this is feminist” and more about living it every single day.

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2. Toys and TV – Let’s Break Those Stereotypes

When you’re shopping for toys, skip the whole “this is for boys, this is for girls” nonsense. Let your kid explore what they’re into – whether it’s dolls, trucks, or a ninja turtle action figure. No need to put things in neat little boxes. Boys can love baking, and girls can build epic LEGO castles. Simple as that.

And TV shows? Here’s the tea: the best ones are the ones that show everyone doing cool stuff. Think Moana, Elsa, or even the women of Star Wars (yes, Rey, we see you). It’s about creating a world where your kids see characters breaking gender norms and living their best lives without apology. After all, anyone can save the day – no cape required (unless you’re into capes, in which case, rock on).

3. Language Matters (A Lot)

Little ears are always listening, and they’re soaking in language like a sponge with a filter. So, when it comes to how we talk about things – especially when it comes to gender – it matters more than we realize. Ditch phrases like “you throw like a girl” or “that’s for boys.” Instead, teach them that actions and interests aren’t limited by gender. Whether it’s a boy wanting to wear a dress or a girl excited about getting dirty in the mud, the rule is simple: it’s all okay.

And while we’re at it, get comfy with inclusive language. They’ll benefit from hearing things like “that person is non-binary” or “they prefer to be called they/them.” It’s about making sure they know everyone’s identity is valid and deserves respect.

4. Be Open About Gender Fluidity

We’ve come a long way, but let’s be real – the world’s not all pink and blue anymore. So why pretend that gender is? By the time your kids are old enough to understand, talk to them about how gender can be fluid. It doesn’t always have to be male or female, and that’s okay.

Whether a child’s friend feels more comfortable as a boy one day and a girl the next, or someone in their life identifies as non-binary, make it a normal part of conversation. Ask questions like, “How would you feel if someone didn’t want to be called ‘he’ or ‘she’?” Explain that it’s all about respecting someone’s self-identified gender and making them feel seen. The more normalized this conversation is in your house, the more accepting your kids will be.

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5. Empathy: The Secret Feminist Ingredient

At the heart of feminism is empathy – the ability to put yourself in someone else’s shoes. Teaching your kids to care for others, understand struggles, and support their friends is key. You can make it real for them by talking about situations where people might not get treated equally – whether it’s the way girls are treated in sports or how someone is judged for their appearance. Then teach them what to do with that info: stand up, speak out, and offer kindness.

You don’t need to make it a heavy talk either. Small things like, “Do you think it’s fair when we see women in movies always having to be rescued by a man?” or, “Wouldn’t it be cool if we had more shows where women were the heroes?” Casual, but impactful.

6. Celebrate Women’s Achievements – Big and Small

One of the easiest ways to foster respect and admiration for women is to highlight women’s achievements – not just the historical heavyweights like Marie Curie or Rosa Parks (though definitely them too), but the everyday women in your life.

Maybe it’s a teacher, a neighbour, or even a colleague who’s doing something extraordinary. Let your kids know that women aren’t just passive participants in history. We’ve been making waves for centuries! Celebrating this will help your kids appreciate the strength, intelligence, and creativity of women – and inspire them to make their own mark on the world.

7. Challenge the Norms Together

Finally, one of the best ways to teach your kids inclusivity is to challenge the norms when you see them. Point out instances of inequality in the media, sports, or school and ask your kids how they feel about them. Did they notice that the girl was treated differently from the boy? Or that the only women in the story were playing supporting roles? Discuss it openly.

This not only shows them how to question societal norms but also makes them feel like they’re a part of the solution. It turns their curiosity into activism, and that’s a powerful combo.

Wrapping It Up: Feminism Doesn’t Have to Be a Lecture

Raising feminist kids isn’t about constantly lecturing them on equality (though, some gentle nudges don’t hurt). It’s about living the values you want to instill in them, celebrating diversity, and teaching them how to challenge stereotypes when they see them. And if all else fails, just remember this: kids are watching, they’re listening, and they’re learning. So let’s make sure the world they inherit is one that’s a little more inclusive, kind, and – yep – feminist.

Now go on, give them a high five for being awesome little human beings. They’re learning from the best!