Sex Toys: The Rise of Female Sexual Expression

Every celebrity seems to be bringing them out, everyone you know probably has one in their bedside drawer, and a large amount of screen time during the pandemic was dedicated to them. Yes, we’re talking about sex toys!

Sex toys might have been around for decades (or since the dawn of time if you really take a look back!), but they’ve only really become more mainstream, widely available, and less taboo in recent years.

During the pandemic, with so many of our sex dates cancelled and the mammoth of time we were all spending at home feeling like it was never going to come to an end, the intrigue of sex toys reached an all-time high.

Whilst we were all spending time getting busy (or buzzy, rather!), what we didn’t realize was that the benefits associated with the uptake in the use of these devices didn’t just stop at our health and happiness - these toys actually began to impact our sexual expression as a whole!

In this article, we’re going to take a deep dive into the relationship between sex toys and female sexual expression, because, perhaps surprisingly for some, they’re inextricably linked!

Why Sex Toys Are So Important When It Comes To Female Expression

For far too long women’s pleasure has been either given a back seat or completely disregarded in relation to male-centric pleasure.

Unfortunately, for many, they will be able to count on one hand how many sexual experiences they’ve had that specifically focused on their pleasure as a woman.

The problem with male-centric pleasure isn’t just that it deprives women of sexual pleasure, but it disregards female sexual expression and makes it an unimportant or in some cases even “hysterical” topic.

Whilst people have been trying to reframe this view and promote female sexual expression for years, the rise of not only the options available on the sex toy market but the sheer consumption of sex toys by women has accelerated this movement and is making real change, one orgasm-gap closing “oh yeah” at a time!

One of the main reasons sex toys are so wonderful when it comes to empowering women is that they are a tool we can use to bring ourselves to the highest heights of pleasure without anyone else having to be involved!

A sex toy will never interrupt your schedule the morning after, be a selfish lover and leave you unsatisfied, or talk to you about how cryptocurrency is changing the world - the only purpose for your sex toy is to bring you pleasure and you can enjoy everything it offers you, risk-free!

Empowerment is often associated with independence, and in this case of giving yourself pleasure without the need for anyone else, that’s certainly true - it’s empowering to put yourself first and enjoy yourself without any type of reliance on another person.

Sex toys don’t just allow us to enjoy self-pleasure though, they also help us to discover our sexual selves, explore parts of our sexuality that we may have never found through ordinary sex or self-pleasure, and genuinely make us feel more empowered through our sexual desire.

It’s Not Just Selfish Though: Sex Toys Are Also Transforming Partnered Sex

The orgasm gap is real! Research shows that whilst men will report to orgasming 80% of the time they first hook up with someone, women only report reaching orgasm 40% of the time when hooking up with someone new - yes, we’re losing out 50% of the time!

However, the good news is, sex toys are helping us bridge this gap and not just because we’re all a little more inclined to use sex toys during partnered sex, but because we’ve become more aware of what we like and what our bodies respond well to.

Using a toy, you have both the freedom and the ability to discover your sexual self, understanding what feels good for you, what brings you to orgasm, and what truly turns you on.

Once you learn what you actually like sexually, you can then communicate this with your partner(s) and start to have more enjoyable sex with them!

Now, before you start to think, “Oh gosh no, I could never communicate my needs and wants in the bedroom (or whatever you do it!) with my partner”, this is where the beauty of sex toys truly comes in! Sex toys don’t just bring you O’s, they support you in properly expressing your needs because they bring you a new found level of confidence in your sexual self.

The likelihood that you’ll just go along with what your partner likes because you’re focused solely on them and their pleasure after you’ve used sex toys for a while is minuscule - you’ll begin to make partnered sex about your pleasure too, which is how it should be!

So, before you think that using sex toys is self-indulgent, I’m here to tell you that it absolutely is not - sex toys benefit everyone. After all, your partner(s), will want you to derive pleasure from your sexual activity together!

If your partner is still a little wary of your toys, help them to reframe the way they think - toys are their friends, not their competition!

Clitoral Specific Toys Are Changing The Game

Whilst vibrators and dildos have been around and widely used for a long while, clitoral specific toys have started to take over the market in the last few years, and it’s not only bringing us more joy, but it’s helping educate everyone!

Studies show that around 75% of women cannot orgasm for penetration alone - hence the reason why the orgasm gap might be so substantial!

The clitoris is the most sensitive part of the vulva because it contains so many nerves - it has twice as many nerves as the end of a penis! So, it’s only logical that for most women, the clitoris needs to be focused on and stimulated in order to achieve orgasm.

Have you ever been with someone who completely ignored the clitoris? It’s no fun!

The rise in clitorial specific sex toys is a huge step towards equality, even if that sounds a little odd.

By creating toys that specifically focus on a part of the vulva that brings women the most joy but is often the most forgotten about, the sex toy industry is putting women first and telling the world that we should all be giving an extra bit of love to the clitoris - it’s not all about penetration anymore and everyone’s finally getting their head around that!

Together, Let’s Rise!

Female sexuality is incredibly sacred - we’re beings that deserve just as much pleasure as everyone else, but unfortunately, for far too long, we’ve been shamed into thinking that our needs are unimportant or that our desire for sexual pleasure is dirty.

But, it’s time to say goodbye to these outdated patriarchal beliefs once and for all, and the sex toy industry is definitely helping us out with that!

Whether you’re having conversations with your friends about your favourite toys, you’re introducing toys into the bedroom with partners, you’re shopping around for your first-ever toy, or you’re finally ready to dip your toe into the wonderful world of self-pleasure, I’m proud of you for expressing your sexual self, and you should be too!

Together, let’s keep expressing ourselves, because our sexuality is important.